A Memoir of L's Questionable Behaviors
by cosmopolitankitten
Summary: Light decides to observe L's habits when he is handcuffed to the detective on a 24/7 basis, but when one must be with his intellectual equal all the time, attraction is bound to occur. As Light struggles with his human urges he vows to find the same urges in L. But how does L eat so many sweets? And does he even sleep? He's human too, right? Rating is now M! LxLight
1. Night 1: Sleep

So L is a strange guy. That much is obvious. He spends the majority of his time in front of computer screens, in the dark. Hell, he spends more time staring at screens than cats do sleeping. So how exactly does he carry out his daily life? He wrongly suspects me of being Kira, and still doesn't trust me after I put myself up for solitary, so we're going to be together 24-7 now. It's the perfect time to find out about him. After all, he'll be watching my every move. I might as well stay one step ahead of him!

But right now it was time for bed.

"Ryuzaki, come on. It's 11:30 already. Everyone else is probably asleep by now." I protested. L ate his last cherry and looked a little disappointed.

"I don't feel particularly tired. Do you, Light?" L quirked, voice slightly muffled as he tied the cherry stems in his mouth.

"I need to study in the morning. It would be nice if I could get at least 7 hours of sleep tonight." I pointed out. L visibly rolled his eyes.

"Hm. 2 hours usually does it for me." L muttered. "...if I can sleep at all." _Ugh._ I placed my hand gently on his shoulder.

"Look, Ryuzaki, I know you suffer from insomnia. But, maybe if you really try, you can get some real REM tonight!" I suggested enthusiastically, getting up to pull L with me. I was a bit irritated by the exhaustion, though. And naturally, L didn't budge an inch. Damn.

"Isn't this a bit childish? If you're that tired, I assumed you would have fallen asleep already..." L drawled, apparently unwilling to get up. "Hm, and what would Kira do in this situation..." I resisted the urge to huff out in exasperation. I didn't need to be compared to Kira right now.

"Normal people need sleep, Ryuzaki." I retorted gently. There was no way I could fall asleep with L typing away and with all the bright lights around.

"Actually, college students in America sleep an average of 45 hours a week." L stated. He did have a point, but most freshman college students weren't in the police force. I didn't have any time for parties, not that they're my style anyway, and I had to sleep if I wanted to concentrate.

"How about this? You need to eat lots of sugar to keep yourself going through the day, right? It's similar for me, except I need to sleep for at least 7 hours to have adequate concentration during the day."

"I don't have to eat sugar. I just prefer to. What's really responsible for keeping me awake is caffeine." L retorted. "Though sugar _is_ good for cognitive function." I stared at him in slight defeat. Maybe I would have to pick him up. Hm, it would appear to be an affectionate gesture if I played it correctly...and we could make a better team in pursuit of Kira if we were closer friends. It was a rash move, but I thought it was a good one to make. Considering how easy it would be to carry him...he was nearly my height, but was clearly underweight. I could do it with little difficulty.

"I guess I have no choice." I said darkly. It was a joke, really. If L thought I was going to do something aggressive, he would be sorely mistaken. He looked at me with a somewhat confused but innocent expression, mouth parted slightly, as I approached him. Quickly but gently I slipped my left arm under his thighs, penetrating his secure sitting position, and then slid my right around his back, and he was swept from his chair in an instant. He had no choice but to wrap one arm around my shoulders.

"Light."

"Yes?"

"What are you doing?"

"I'm sorry, but it seemed this was necessary." I was pretty satisfied with myself. Here I was, carrying the greatest detective in the world like he was a little child. Ha. I looked at his disgruntled face. He was almost cute, even. Almost.

After shutting off the lights in the main room, I carried him to the bedroom and he started squirming, sending a foot to lightly kick my face.

"Hey!" I protested. L jumped out of my arms and made his way to the adjoining bathroom, dragging me along with him. In there he opened a drawer and took out a quite large electric toothbrush. I stifled a laugh: was this how L avoided cavities?

L saw my expression in the mirror and rolled his eyes, dispensing a lot of toothpaste onto the brush and wetting it before starting to clean his teeth. Then I realized I didn't have my own toothbrush. Damn.

"I apologize, Light. I believe Mr. Yagami has your belongings in his hotel room." L said, reading my mind. "But, if you would like, you are free to borrow my toiletries instead."

"Oh, that's fine, Ryuzaki. I can wait until morning." I passed his offer. It wasn't a big deal, really.

"Are you sure, Light? I am aware that you were allowed to take a shower after your time in prison before I required that we be handcuffed together, but you didn't get to brush your teeth, did you?" L pressed, voice amusingly muffled by his toothbrush. "You could get a cavity." Ugh. Did L actually have a problem? I think he most likely had OCD judging by his behavior and his obsession with cleanliness. Maybe he couldn't stand it if others weren't clean as well? But that would be pushing it. I looked at him. His mouth was full of foam. We stood in silence for a while before L finally rinsed out his mouth. Maybe it was just me, but it felt like he had brushed his teeth for at least 3 minutes. He washed the head of the toothbrush off and handed it to me.

"It's alright. Really." I asserted, holding my hand up in assurance.

"Please." L said with a certain hospitality, tilting his head slightly. I sighed with exasperation.

"I can go one night without brushing my teeth."

"No!" L was adamant. "You weren't able to properly brush your teeth during your imprisonment either." He squirted some toothpaste onto the brush and shoved it at my mouth. I reluctantly took it.

"Alright, Ryuzaki." I chuckled. "If you insist." I guess I had gotten used to the feeling of a not-so-clean mouth. I didn't really have a choice in a prison cell. But L's toothpaste was a pleasing flavor of mint, and it would be nice to have a fresh mouth again. It was awkward, though, as I brushed and L stared off into the distance.

When I was finally done, L told me that I should have brushed for a minute and twenty seconds longer, and we turned the light off, going back to the bedroom. I kind of had to pee, but I didn't really want to deal with that issue right now and L wasn't saying anything about himself either.

"You can take the bed, Ryuzaki." I offered politely. "If you could give me a pillow and one sheet, I'll be fine on the floor."

"What do you mean, Light? It would be rude of me to make you do that, besides, you could be up to something when out of my sight, no?" L countered, gesturing to the bed. "Don't tell me you haven't shared a bed with another man before."

"No, that's not it..." I replied calmly, deciding to just go with it. I had shared a bed on the school trip in eighth grade to Tokyo, but usually during camps and sleepovers I slept on an individual futon. It wasn't a big deal, though. And maybe I could find out more about L. After all, I was pretty sure he didn't sleep at all. The bags under his eyes suggested a more-than-severe case of sleeplessness, though I didn't understand how his health wasn't affected.

"Alright then. Lights out." L said. A smile tugged at his mouth. "Get it?"

"Very funny, Ryuzaki." It would be more comfortable to sleep only in my boxers but it looked like L intended to sleep in his jeans. Maybe he would change in the morning. L turned off the lamp and got on top of the bed in his usual sitting position. I crawled in on his right side, resting my arms behind my head. This was gonna be weird, but I would try to get to sleep.

"Good night, Light." L said after a few minutes, jolting me back into consciousness as I almost lost it. Damn.

"Y-yeah. Good night, Ryuzaki." I muttered sleepily, casting a quick glance at the detective beside me. L was still holding his knees. Did he really sleep like that?

...

I woke up to a sensation on the top of my head and the sound of clicking chains. I turned my head to see L in a sprawled position, legs and arms spread out and his shirt hiked up a bit on his torso. His right hand was twitching and tugging slightly at my hair. His breathing was barely audible, but his face held an innocent expression, mouth opened slightly. He rolled over to face me, emitting an adorable noise, and I felt my cheeks heat up slightly. I adjusted myself so I wasn't facing him and closed my eyes again, telling my tired mind not to think about what I had just witnessed.

Night 1 Observations:

1\. L doesn't like to sleep.

2\. L brushes his teeth with an electric toothbrush for 3 minutes every night to prevent cavities.

3\. L falls asleep in his sitting position but spreads out his body through the night, probably to relax his muscles after holding them in position for so long.

4\. L looks kinda like a kitten when he sleeps.

I hoped to find out much more about L tomorrow.

...

A/N: haha! ummm...please let me know what you think so I can improve this in later chapters! This is my first Death Note fic but I'm really into it so I'll be writing lots more! This fic will have new themes each chapter, concerning L and Light's struggles when they are handcuffed together. I'm trying to make it as realistic as possible, so please hold your butts if you're waiting for yaoi - it will come, it is inevitable. But please note that I am trying to keep this in context for the anime more than anything.

did anyone get the REM joke? haha

I also just made a new DeviantArt and drew a picture for this chapter. Haha! You can check it out if you'd like. My deviantart: cosmopolitankitten

have a great day/night *kisses


	2. Morning 1: Wood

Music listened to while writing:

Endless Fantasy by Amanaguchi, Ken Ashcorp, and Forever by Mystery Skulls

lol enjoy, or at least try to xD

...

I woke up to an unwanted feeling.

"Please stop that." I muttered, words coming out as barely comprehensible. It was rude to shake someone when they were trying to sleep.

"Ryuzaki, it's time to get up." a graceful but somewhat impatient voice said softly. Was that...Light? Ugh. Of course Kira would try to wake me up. That increases my suspicion by...cake percent...I tried to open my eyes and flinched at the harsh lightness of the room.

"Light Yagami." I slurred quickly, sitting up suddenly and shaking my head a bit.

"Yes, that's me. Are you alright?" the man next to me asked politely. I blinked, and tried to adjust to the light, but failed miserably. Shaking off his question, I flopped back down onto my pillow.

"Not particularly. Please leave me be." I would not be vacating the bed right now. Immediately I felt myself slipping back into unconsciousness.

"Ryuzaki, it's already 8:00. I've been up for 20 minutes already. We need to get to work." the man pressed. I ignored him completely, instead choosing to grab a fistful of fluffy blanket and pull it towards me, curling up into a tighter fetal position that was even more comfortable than before. It would just be plain stupid to get up right now.

...

Damnit. L didn't want to get up. He just kept sleeping. And worse, he looked like a precious little brat while doing it. And _worse_ , I had two _other_ problems going on right now. Damn the mornings. Damn being a teenager. _Damn my bladder, damn my dick_. I could be a poet.

I was trying my best to be patient, but for the past twenty minutes I've been alternately trying to wake up, mentally assess the Kira case, and focus on not peeing my pants. Speaking of pants, I need to change. Speaking of pants, I hate male anatomy. Apparently twenty minutes wasn't long enough to make my _problem_ go away, but my bladder couldn't take the pressure anymore so L _had to get up_. _Now_.

"Please, Ryuzaki." I pleaded, touching the detective's shoulder more gently this time. "I'm sure the task force will be knocking at the door any minute now."

"Nn." L moaned softly, rolling over to face me with his eyes still closed. "That's not true. Watari will be the one to get me up. He'll call, okay?" With that affirmation L re-curled himself and relaxed again. Ugh. He was right, wasn't he? I guess I would have to tell the truth.

"Well...despite that, Ryuzaki, I'm sorry, but I really have to use the bathroom..." Damn, I felt my face heating up in embarrassment, but it really wasn't that big of a deal! Right?

"Oh, I see..." L muttered. His eyes shot open suddenly, looking more tired than ever. "Yes, let's go." He got up in possibly the weirdest way possible, first scooting up to his normal sitting position, standing up on the bed, and then jumping off of it, making his way to the bathroom. I swung my legs over my side of the mattress and followed suit. I took in his standing form. His hair was hilariously messy and his pants were way low on his hips. I smirked inwardly, but stopped feeling so smug when I remembered my bladder. L somehow made it to the toilet before me, and I turned around with a scarlet flush on my face as I waited for him to finish. Damn, why did L have to drink so much tea? I grabbed my hardened junk in agony and tapped my foot, and eventually L was at the sink washing his hands. He gave me a deadpan look.

"What's wrong, Light?" he inquired. I sharply inhaled.

"...Nothing!" I hobbled over to the toilet and gave L, who was staring at me, a sharp glare. "Hey, don't look at me!"

"I...apologize." L turned away. "No need to be so self-conscious." His tone was one of satire, which only served to annoy me more. And it was really hard to pee in my current state, but I tried my best, and tried not to moan in relief. When I was done I joined L to wash my hands, also splashing cold water over my face and adjusting my messy hair to look presentable.

"Need a comb?" L offered, whipping one out of nowhere. Wait, L actually combed his hair? Wow, in that case it was probably really soft. Um, probably not as soft as mine though. No guy can beat my hair. "Actually, Light, could we take a shower now?" He wanted to take a shower? Now? I felt more unwanted blood flood south as my mind rushed to unwanted places.

"Uh...Ryuzaki, could we possibly wait until tonight to do that?" I replied, trying to return to a state of calmness. I had many reasons for not wanting to take a shower right now. And yet the word _tonight_ seemed only to make one of those reasons worse. I tried to do some math problems in my head, but God knows that method doesn't ever work.

"I already told you, Light. There's no reason to be self-conscious." L said quite normally, but to my ear it sounded like he was teasing. Or maybe he was. "After all, the fact that I suspect you of being Kira is far worse than the fact that we will have to shower together." Yeah, he probably was teasing. Dick move. Literally.

"Well, I just think we need to get going. We need to change clothes and get ready to start working." I pointed out. I mentally smacked myself, just last night I had argued that I _needed to study_ in the morning, but obviously all my study crap was with my dad. What I had brought here, anyway. God, I might as well just fail all my college classes. Calm down. There's few better excuses for missing school than being _voluntarily locked up in prison_ in interest of helping the most important criminal case in the world. I was so far behind already, and one day of not studying wasn't going to make much of a difference. I guess I was just used to routine, even after the physically and cognitively draining and yet almost enlightening days of solitary.

"Light, whatever insecurity you have about your-" L's phone rang from the other room. He cut off his sentence that was clearly taking a bad direction, and I was quite grateful. Whether he was going to say "body" or something else, I didn't know. And hopefully wouldn't ever know. Breaking off my thoughts, L whipped around, shot me a frightening gaze, and glanced below my waist for a second before rolling his eyes back up to meet mine and giving me the creepiest smirk. He then headed to the bedroom to answer his phone. Um. Well, I hoped it wasn't that obvious. But I literally couldn't do anything about it. I swallowed nervously and followed him.

It was Watari, of course. I suddenly felt like worshipping the old man for saving me from my predicament. But I would still have to shower with L later...the square root of 625 is 25. 21 squared is 441...(x+3) times (x-6) equals x squared minus 3x minus 18. I braced myself as L conversed with Watari, and as soon as he hung up there was a knock at the door.

Just hold out until tonight.

I didn't want it to happen, but at the same time, I definitely needed it to...I know I was pathetic, but it wasn't something I could really help...

L, I really hope you'll understand...

...

Morning 1 Observations:

1\. L doesn't like to sleep because it requires _waking up_ again.

2\. L has no sense of time. The one who maintains it for him is Watari.

3\. L is _not_ self-conscious about his body at all...as far as I can tell...

4\. L is a pervert...(?)

At this point I don't know what to think...but I should gather lots more information tonight...

...

A/N: Omg this fanfiction is such a mess. I don't know if this chapter is possible to understand unless you're a pervert...? Which I am? Omg but I think I'll still keep the rating at T for now...but I'll definitely need to change it for the next chapter. Hahaha!

Also things should start to make a little more sense the chapter after next chapter...because I think I'll skip a little bit to where L and Light are at the secret building thing. Because they're still at some random hotel right now which is kind of annoying to work with. xD

So yeah, this is pretty messy atm, but I actually have solid plans for next chapter, so that's good! Haha! And the rating is going to M for suuurree!

Nonetheless, please review so I can make improvements to this fic! Suggestions are welcome!

The beginning was indeed in L's point of view due to request, and yes, next chapter will have more of L's POV and thoughts that aren't completely muddled by sleep! ;D

oh and dat chapter title. get it? xD

Have a great day/night! *kisses

much love!


	3. Night 2: Desperation

I actually ended up listening to some Gaga when writing this hahahaha xD

But Ghost by Mystery Skulls is definitely the most fitting song for this...Light definitely "might just disappear" hahahaha

Yeah so this chapter took a lil bit of Monday night and LOTS of tonight to write...I took the ACT today hahaha...or I guess technically yesterday...blahhhh

*rating goes up to M* ;D

...

It was nine o'clock, and Watari had just left the hotel room. All day, Light had been acting quite strangely. And yet, not in a suspicious way. No; his character was entirely different than before. Before his imprisonment, one could sense his underlying smugness and theatrical desire for justice. Now, he was more pure, more _real_ , more truly integrious like his father. Whatever evil that seemed to boil below his skin had diminished; hence my hunch that perhaps Kira could transfer power from person to person at will. After all, a similar effect had also appeared to take place in Misa Amane at nearly the same time.

Anyway, Light would hopefully let me take a shower now. Cleanliness was essential; I had always thought so. I supposed it would be nice to be at my cleanest state before slumber, but what was the point of such a thing if I was not also at my cleanest state the night before?

In any case, I dragged Light to the bathroom.

"Hold on, Ryuzaki. Let me get my stuff." Light protested. The college student had retrieved his bag from his father, so I suppose it would be interesting to find out what was in there. But that could wait.

"My apologies. Everything I need is already in the bath." I had quite a set-up in there, in fact.

"Hey, I have a question." Light suddenly inquired.

"Hm?"

"Um, exactly how much do you rely on Watari?" Oh. I suppose anyone would be curious.

"I relied far more on him in the past. I can explain if you'd like."

"Sure, go ahead."

"Alright then. Watari was the one who took me in and cared for me; my surrogate father." I didn't want to discuss the years before Watari came to my aid. Those times were pushed to the very back of my mind, but they were also composed of many vivid flashbulb memories. "I had managed to survive before his care, but I was nonetheless hardly able to function normally. Watari's dedication to assisting me as well as his many resources and inventions helped me in daily routines." I paused.

"What kind of inventions?" Light asked curiously.

"Ah, well, my favorite was probably his 'human washer.' I didn't even have to bother cleaning myself, all I had to do was sit in it." Light busted out a chuckle.

"Like a washing machine? That's interesting." he affirmed. "But you can take real showers now?"

"Well, of course, Light. I've become much more independent from Watari in the past three years." I retorted, holding my cool tone but feeling a bit embarrassed on the inside. "I had no choice; in case something unfortunate happens to him, I must be prepared to continue on in his absence." This was not something I wanted to think about; I was eternally grateful to Watari for his services and everything good he brings to the world. In many ways, _I_ was not justice at all, but Watari was the very _definition_ of justice.

"Oh, I understand." Light said. "I truly admire Watari. He really is the definition of justice, isn't he?" Oh. There it was. Yes, Light had read my mind, but that was inevitable. What I found more striking was the way Light said such a sentence...in the past, his eyes would have played games with me, would have appeared to glow red...he would seem to be teasing, taunting me that _he_ was justice and I was just a stick in the mud _,_ worthless, another pawn to be eliminated in his quest for world domination.

This was not Kira, however. This was merely the college student Light Yagami, and his eyes held a captivating sparkle, innocent and wondrous. This man, this possibly innocent man, was the only person in my life to match my intellectual level...I was lucky to be tied together with him, to be "friends" with him.

And now I would get to take a shower with him. Somehow my insecurities heightened more than ever before; I was truly nervous now...but the exact feeling could not be explained, at least not with logic. But at least I had a certain advantage...

...

Okay, this was finally it. _Finally_. But damn, what am I thinking? I haven't felt like this in months...no, I haven't had issues with animalistic hormones since my depression onset during sophomore year...I dated women only for the experience, and not for sexual reasons...sure, thinking back to it, the fact that L held me in prison, cameras watching my every move, somehow now seems almost alluring, but in the moment I know I felt incredibly chaste and even repressed.

Since the morning, I had managed to calm down and focus completely whilst working with the Task Force members, but now that it was just L and me, that feeling I had this morning returned without restraint. I listened to L with fascination; the topic of his past was weird, but it was just impossible to have negative thoughts about him right now.

But why? Why the hell didn't I feel like this before? Was it the chain that connected us, perhaps? Was it a trick? After all, just looking at the handcuff on my left hand made me feel a bit turned on - the thought of being bonded to L like this was just...

Before yesterday, I hadn't a single perverse perspective of L. He was my intellectual equal, and suspected me and Misa to be Kira, and that was all. But new feelings just kept swarming my systems every second I looked at him, and it was almost unfair.

No, no...it wasn't L, it was just me, wasn't it? My hormones are spinning out of control and, in my situation, L is my only outlet for their desires.

I took a deep breath. I couldn't let my body get the best of me. I had a disciplined character, and it might heighten L's suspicions in the case that I lost control.

"What's wrong, Light?" L suddenly asked. I broke out of my trance. "You've been staring at me for the past-"

"Oh! Sorry, Ryuzaki. Let's turn on the water now." I said too quickly.

"Well, in that case we should probably undress first." L pointed out. I felt heat rush to my face. Ugh! Calm down! I changed into new clothes this morning, but we faced away from each other...there was some difficulty in changing with the handcuff on, but it was doable. If I wore a shirt with tighter cuffs it would be much worse, so I would try to avoid that for now.

"Ha, of course!" I replied lightly, trying to pretend I wasn't deathly nervous. I turned around, but what was the point? We were going to see each other anyway!

"Light, I know you're insecure, but if it makes you feel better-" L started.

"I'm not insecure, Ryuzaki. It's fine." I proved my point by unbuttoning my shirt more quickly and sliding it off, though my flushed face contradicted my words.

"Well, I was just going to say that I have already seen you in all states of undress." L continued. "But I'm sure you already know that, since you're aware of the fact that cameras were installed in your home for some time." Oh, damn! L was lying to me. I had been strategic in how I changed my clothing during that period of time, and the cameras were not installed in view of any showers or toilets. L surely never saw me in anything less than my undergarments. And I never engaged in any personal sexual behavior besides my fabricated search through men's magazines. Why had I done that again? I couldn't remember. But those magazines certainly did not catch my interest. Nonetheless, the way L said he "had already seen" me made my confidence drop even lower. I turned around to face him as he was pulling his shirt off of his head. I was going to say something but my breath temporarily caught in my throat. I swallowed heavily, trying my best to focus on L's face and internally screaming at my dick to stop getting excited.

"Erm, of course I knew about those cameras. I was a bit embarrassed, so I never undressed completely where I thought the cameras were." I managed to say. L tilted his head.

"You are correct, though I do wonder how you knew exactly where the cameras were." Now that L mentioned it, I'm not sure how I knew. I suppose I searched for them in curiosity.

"I was curious, honestly, so I searched for them and found 64 in my room." L's eyes widened in disbelief.

"You are correct again, but I don't recall ever seeing you searching for the cameras..." What? I guess he was trying to trip me up. I shrugged.

"You probably just don't remember." I felt bad saying it. L didn't forget things, after all. I turned around again in self-consciousness and began to take off my pants. My heart was hammering inside my chest, made worse by the perplexity of this conversation. But it still wasn't as bad as the real reason I was so nervous. Ugh, I really had to strip naked in front of L, anything else would just be strange. _Just keep your eyes up. Eyes up._

"Strange, but I suppose it would be expected of you to search for the cameras that were invading your privacy..." L concluded. There were more loopholes for sure. For example, why would I look in the magazines if I knew about the cameras? I didn't know. My memory from that time was extremely fuzzy for some reason.

I heard L's pants heavily drop to the floor, accompanied by a lighter sound seconds later. So I finally slid my boxers off my legs, mind hurting from the pressure of the situation. L was probably staring at my ass right now. Great. What I couldn't figure out was if this would be less difficult if I _wasn't_ horny right now. No, it would still be difficult, because I didn't particularly want the great L to see my in my most vulnerable state. At least I wasn't fat, right? No, I was underweight. Was that worse? Was I too skinny? Stop thinking about it! Wait, L might be underweight too...

...

"Let's go, Light." L said softly. I picked up my materials and walked immediately into the shower. God, this sucks! There was no way L was interested in me or doing anything with me. He was probably asexual. And yet, I swear that the way he looked at me and spoke this morning was somehow utterly perverted. I had probably just imagined it, however. Every instinct screamed at me to turn around and do something, _anything_ , but I forced myself instead to place my stuff down and turn on the water. Fearing that hot water could turn me on even more, I made it merely lukewarm. "Hm? You don't like the water to be hot?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you might prefer it this way." I lied through my teeth.

"That's quite alright. Make it however hot you wish." L assured. Feeling pressured, I turned the water up until it was almost scalding. "Yes, that's fine." Luckily I was the one directly under the stream, so I quickly wet my hair and then turned it further out to reach L, getting out of his way. Then I reached for my shampoo and began thoroughly lathering it deep into my scalp. I couldn't ignore the fact that L was right behind me. It seemed like his eyes were burning into my back, but that somehow managed to arouse me even more. The steam from the shower was already getting to me, too, and I focused as hard as I could on washing my hair.

"Are you okay, Light?" L asked, breaking the dead silence. It shocked me and for a second I feared slipping on the wet shower floor. I was okay, though, and I tried to keep composed.

"Of course. Why do you ask, Ryuzaki?" I replied smoothly. At least as smoothly as I could in this situation.

"You've been washing your hair for roughly three minutes. That's starting to be too long. I'm sure you don't want to strip your hair of the nutrients it needs." L stated. "If you need help, just ask me." My breath hitched at those last words, sending a torrent of blood headed straight south. Okay, so I definitely couldn't turn around now. L pushed the shower stream back to where it would hit me. I was silently grateful as I tried to come up with something coherent to reply with.

"It's called conditioner, Ryuzaki." I pointed out confidently. _Uuuughhhhh._ I washed out the shampoo and in confirmation poured out some conditioner, running it through my hair next. But my mind kept repeating that one phrase. _If you need help, just ask me._ Hell yes, L, please help me. I just...if we could get involved, maybe it would make this whole thing easier...if we became familiar with each other's bodies...right? God, I'm literally making excuses for my hormones. This was so awkward! How the hell was I going to wash the rest of my body? I didn't have a goddamn washcloth or loofah or anything, and L was probably going to make fun of me for it. I rinsed the conditioner out of my hair, and L decided to speak up. I knew it.

"Light, would you mind washing my back?" Oh god. I wasn't expecting that. Um. No, I really wasn't expecting _that._ L, why did you have to ask that? _Why why why?_

"No, I wouldn't mind." I tried to keep my voice level, but I probably failed. Now I had to turn around. I looked over my shoulder, trying to keep my eyes up, but I still had to look at L. In all his glory. _Fuck._ His skin was glowing a robust pink in the steamy air and his wet hair clung closely to his face and neck in quite possibly the most attractive way possible, his eyes looking up from behind the soaked locks with what seemed to be a mix of carnal and innocent intentions. Drops of water ran down his body with torturous languidity and I couldn't help but notice his defined, elongated clavicle presenting below it an overly appealing chest and torso. My heart beat ever faster and my mind suggested that I pounce at him. Right now. Resistance was nearly futile, but I held myself back with all my might. L shyly turned around, revealing an unfairly alluring backside. I exhaled and faced him, eyes flicking to a bottle of red shower gel standing on the corner of the shower.

I carefully reached around him while desperately trying to avoid getting too close. Looking down, my erection was in dangerous proximity to L's rear. I averted my eyes to avoid seeing past his torso - the sight was all too much to handle already. With shaking hands, I poured some of the strawberry gel onto my hand and pulled back, preparing myself to wash L's back. Oh _god_ , I could really touch him. Finally, I rubbed the soap onto his skin, lathering up suds and getting both hands involved. I stroked his shoulder blades and worked them in a circular motion, feeling the sharp bones subtly relax at the touch. I went over his tantalizingly visible spine and L emitted a high-pitched noise that went directly to my groin. Could it be...? No. Did L just...moan? No way. There's no way _I_ just made him moan. I whimpered a bit too loudly at the thought and felt L jump slightly at the sound. I moved my hands to the base of his neck and squeezed lightly, massaging the area there. We didn't exchange any words as I washed the rest of his back. When I was done my hands reluctantly vacated his skin.

"I can wash your back too if you'd like." L quickly offered. Panicking slightly, I turned around again to avoid L's potential gaze.

"Do what you want." Oh god, that didn't come out right at all. Hopefully he wouldn't take it in the wrong way. I mean, hopefully he _would_ take it in the wrong way. God, I don't know. But then I felt L's long fingers on my back, working suds into my skin and massaging deeply to the point where it almost hurt. I could no longer control my breathing and was on the brink of hyperventilating. It was getting way too difficult to hold back. L's hands moved lower and lower on my back and a choked moan broke out of my throat. Millions of butterflies invaded my stomach and my dick throbbed in agony, begging for attention. I stopped my hands from at least touching myself and clenched my fists instead. But I suddenly felt unstable and threw my arms forward so I could cling to the shower wall.

"What's wrong, Light?" L asked innocently, but to my ear it sounded so _taunting_ , so _knowing_. Not fair, not fair. "Remember what I told you. If you need _help_ , just ask me _."_ I groaned in torment, cursing my situation indefinitely. What was L trying to get at? Was he just being an asshole? Or was he actually considering "helping me out?" L ran his hand around my shoulder and under my neck, causing our chain to clink loudly and sending more nervous stimulation throughout my body. I couldn't talk for fear of making more embarrassing noises indicative of my arousal.

"Light, talk to me." L said with an earnest tone that still somehow sounded teasing. He slid his finger along the curve of my neck and down my chest, while his other hand ran down my side. My whole body started to tremble, and I groaned in torment. Okay! So now I had confirmed it. L was definitely a pervert. Was that a good thing? I guess right now it definitely was. But would he really help me out, or would he just tease me for fun? "Just relax." How the hell could I _relax?_ Idiot!

"Light, listen to me. I knew about your little predicament this morning. It's okay." Oh _god._ My face burned an even brighter shade of red than before. This was too much humiliation to bear. "You don't have to try to cover yourself up anymore. I've been aware of your situation from the start." I should've known. Hell, I probably knew in the back of my mind the whole time. After all, L has been suspecting and studying me for a long while now. Yes, I wanted to study _him_ , but at this point he could likely read me like a book in everything I did. Damnit. I really should've known. But I was just trying to retain my dignity! There was nothing wrong in that!

"Do you need my assistance? Just give me a yes or no answer." _Really?_ Wasn't L aware of how embarrassing it would be to say yes...? I wanted him, absolutely, and my only other option was self-gratification, which would be much worse than this since I would have to do it to _myself_ in front of him, but how the hell could I say yes to this? "I was your age not long ago, Light. I understand completely. Do you need my help? Just say yes or no." I sighed.

"Y-yes, L...please." I mumbled in quiet desperation, hoping that L wouldn't ask me to repeat myself. Oh, damn! I had slipped up and forgotten to call him Ryuzaki...and... _aaaaah._

L pressed up against my backside, sending huge, electric shivers throughout me. Oh god, he hadn't even really touched me yet, and I was already feeling as if one more sensation could send me over the edge. But then I felt his warmth leave me and I was soon gently tugged to the bathtub floor, L being careful not to let me slip. The detective pulled me into his arms and immediately got to work. His left hand caressed the top part of my thigh while his right stroked from the bottom of my shaft to the top, rubbing the tip with his thumb briefly and spreading the pre-come that came out all over the length of my cock as he started pumping me.

Fuck. _Fuck_. _FUCK._ I was gone, absolutely wasted. I stopped caring about what pathetic noises I made and just focused on all the pleasure I was being given. L's long legs were pressed against mine from the outside, and I dug my overgrown nails into them in my state of disarray. My face was ridiculously close to L's, and I had an overwhelming urge to turn and kiss him, but it would have been extremely uncomfortable to do so. The continuous stream of hot water spraying right on top of us, the steamy atmosphere, and even the chain between me and L's handcuffs spread out on my chest only made the whole experience better, and I swore I had never felt so good in my life.

It didn't take long at all before I was coming hard into L's hand and onto my stomach, and L kept pumping until I was done with the orgasm. Afterwards, as I was breathing heavily and still whimpering from the lingering pleasure, L gently rubbed all over and around my cock to make sure it was completely clean. Then he reached back to get some of his shower gel and washed the remaining fluids off of my torso with comforting motions, also rubbing suds all over my arms, chest, and legs as well to make my entire body cleansed. My breathing finally returned to its normal inaudible state and I was trapped in a sleepy, tranquil afterglow. I hadn't felt that relaxed in an eternity.

L had to delicately remove me from his chest, as my head had fallen against his neck.

"I know you're tired, Light, but we can go to bed now." He said soothingly, getting up and turning the water off. The loss of the water made me feel a bit sad, but the room was still warm and steamy. I was sitting up on the floor now, not particularly in the mood to get up. L grabbed my wrists and forced me out of the bathtub. Somewhere in the back of my mind I noted that I didn't care about L seeing me naked anymore, and in the front of my mind I realized I still hadn't looked beyond L's waist in front view. But I was too sleepy to deal with such things and decided that looking there could wait until later. Finally out of the shower, L handed me a towel and I sloppily dried my hair, deciding to let the rest of my body air-dry. I was so tired I just wanted to go to sleep. L turned off all of the lights and pulled back the sheets for me. As soon as I got into bed I was out.

...

So. It was evident that I wouldn't sleep tonight. Besides, two nights of a full night's sleep was never a probable part of my schedule. The question was what exactly to do while Light slept.

Oh, Light. I had caught him at his most vulnerable, subject to raging teenage hormones and unable to satisfy himself in a civilized manner because he was handcuffed to me. The whole situation had unfortunately managed to turn me on as well, but I wouldn't be able to do anything about it now. According to Japanese law, Light is within two years of illegality in having sex with an adult. Yes, he was technically an adult now, but only recently so. No way was I going to do anything further than what I just had. Asking him to wash my back, however, was a preference and partially a test, not particularly intended to be a sexual notion.

I will be tolerant of Light's urges and hold back my own so as to make certain that I am not hit with consequences in the future. Light's need tonight required intervention, as he would never have been able to gratify himself in front of me. Judging by the magnitude of tonight's incident and of Light's problem in the morning, Light could probably end up this way every single day. But I would certainly be able to deal with it.

Now why exactly was I so willing to help Light, and how did he manage to turn me on? More importantly, I had felt some kind of certain warmth for Light since the beginning, and it was much more prominent now. I wasn't exactly asexual, but perhaps aromantic. And yet, I had never been particularly attracted to anyone in the past. So why Light? There was a certain term for an attraction to intelligence...I believe it was "sapiosexual," derived from the Latin principle for wisdom, "sapiens." Perhaps that is truly my sexual orientation, and the same thing could hold true for Light as well.

In any case, the coming days would certainly be interesting.

...

A/N: "coming" days omg

pleeaase review so i can make this story better D:


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